Dave The Hen

18 Jun



Dave the hen
Dave came home from the pub

late one  Friday evening stinking drunk

 as he often did

and crept into bed  beside his wife

 who was already asleep
He gave her a peck on the  cheek

and fell asleep

 When he awoke

 he found a strange man

 standing at  the end of his bed

 ‘Who the hell are you?’, demanded Dave

 and what  are you doing in my bedroom

The mysterious man answered

‘This  isn’t your bedroom and I’m St Peter
Dave was stunned

‘You mean  I’m dead !!! That can’t be

 I have so much to live for 

 and I haven’t  said goodbye to my family

You’ve got to send me back straight away

 St Peter replied Yes you can be reincarnated

 but there is a  catch
We can only send you back as a dog or a hen

Dave was devastated

 but knowing there was a farm not far from his house 

 he  asked to be sent back as a hen

A flash of light later

he was  covered in feathers and clucking around

 pecking the  ground
‘This ain’t so bad’, he thought

 until he felt this strange feeling welling up

inside him

 The farmyard rooster strolled  over and said

 So you’re the new hen

 How are you enjoying your first  day here

It’s not so bad replies Dave

 but I have this  strange feeling inside

 like I’m about to explode

You’re  ovulating explained the rooster

 Don’t tell me you’ve never laid an  egg before

Never replies Dave
Well just relax and  let it happen
And so he did

and after a few uncomfortable  seconds later

 an egg pops out from under his tail

 An immense feeling  of relief swept over him

 and his emotions got the better of him

 as he experienced motherhood for the first time
When he laid his  second egg

 the feeling of happiness was overwhelming

and he knew that  being reincarnated as a hen

 was the best thing that ever happened to him Ever
The joy kept coming

and as he was just about to lay  his third egg

 he felt an enormous smack

 on the back of his head

and  heard his wife Shouting

Dave, wake up, you drunken bastard

 You’ve  shit the bed !!’




Posted by on June 18, 2010 in Uncategorized


4 responses to “Dave The Hen

  1. Prenin

    June 19, 2010 at 07:00

    That one caught me out!!! PMSL!!!God Bless!!!Prenin.


  2. Beth

    June 19, 2010 at 07:00

    OH MY! This is a good one!!


  3. Dreamwalker

    June 18, 2010 at 07:00

    hahahaha!!!!!….. is all I have to say….LOL..


  4. Princess

    June 18, 2010 at 07:00




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